20 Firsts

Found this survey online and thought it would be fun to post...I may regret it later!

1. Who was your first crush/love? My very first crush was on a boy named Brad in the first grade.
2. Who was your first kiss and when? I think it was a boy named Chad when my girlfriend & I were playing at his house. The funny part is that Chad has since come out of the closet...hope I didn't have anything to do with that!
3. Who was your first prom date? My ex-husband
4. Who was your first roommate? Carrie, Kris, Della & Kelly at AIB...yup, I had four roomates!!
5. What was your first job? Paper girl
6. What was your first car? Oldmobile Omega ('85, I think)
7. When did you go to your first funeral? The first one I remember was my mom's when I was 7.
8. How old were you when you first moved away from your hometown? 19
9. Who was your first grade teacher? I think her name was Sister Mary Margaret.
10. Where did you go on your first ride on an airplane? Texas
11. Where did you go on your first date and who did you go with? Man, I am getting old cuz I don't remember clearly. Although I had "boyfriends" before this, my first real date (I think) was with my Christmas formal date my junior year.
12. When you snuck out of your house for the first time, who was it with? Never snuck out of the house...my parents were too good.
13. Who was your first best friend and are you still friends with them? Two girlfriends, Bridget and Dawn, and no I don't keep in touch with them.
14. Who was the first person to send you flowers? My ex-husband
15. Where did you live the first time you moved out of your parent's house? I moved into the dorms at AIB in Des Moines.
16. Who is the first person you call when you have a bad day? My hubby
17. Who's wedding were you in the first time you were a bridesmaid? Miri's
18. What is the first thing you do in the morning? Hit the head, start the coffee and change diapers.
19. What was the name of your first pet (and type)? Sammy, cat
20. How old were you when you had your first taste of an adult beverage? I think I was probably about 5 when I had my first little sip of beer....I was much older when I had more than just a little sip. :)

Rocky Lives!!

Ever have one of those days that was so boring and then turns on a dime? We were stuck in the house all day because of the rain. Pretty boring. After dinner, I ran an errand, and that's when it happened....something so shocking and yet preventable....funny and yet not so much...and culminated in Ray's first visit to the E.R.

She swallowed a rock...or at least we think she did.

Let me begin this by saying that sometimes we let Ray play with things that others might find inappropriate. We don't do it to be careless. She has long since passed the stage of putting everything in her mouth...okay, we thought she was past that stage. She is always supervised when playing with said item...okay, well almost always. And we always store it out of reach when she's done...okay, well almost always. Ray found these decorative, polished rocks in our basement awhile ago and loves them. Her level of play involves taking the rocks out of a bucket, lining them up and putting them back into the bucket. Good times. She & I were playing with them earlier today, and I forgot to put them up. My husband didn't realize they were accessible until (after I left) he walked in on her gagging. Quickly assessing the situation, he assumed she swallowed a rock. We didn't want to take any chances, so we packed up the kids and headed for the E.R.

The good news is that Ray did very well despite the late hour, long wait and constant poking by the staff. AND we were in & out in about 2 hours thanks to our privately-run healthcare system. (Sidenote: I'd rather pay a few bucks and be inconvenienced for 2 hours instead of pay nothing and be inconvenienced for 2 days.) The bad news is that we're still not 100% sure that she swallowed a rock. It didn't show up on the x-ray, but the doc & nurse assured us that the rock could still be there. It just may be smaller than we thought, which means it could pass. What goes in must come out, so now it's a waiting...and searching...game. ICK! We agreed that a day off is in order for the person who "discovers" the stone. We kinda laugh about it now, but it could still be a serious situation if the rock causes a blockage as it passes. All we can do it pray for the best and wait....and institute a strick "no little things" play policy.

The truly funny part about this story, which occurred to me at the hospital...is that Ray has finally lived up to the nickname given to her by her grandma at birth...Rocky.

Hot Potato, Cool Potato

Ray loves to toss a ball around, so I thought I'd make it interesting and teach her how to play Hot Potato. She got a kick out of watching me pretend that the ball was hot, but when I told her to do the same, she just held it. She tossed it to me, and it ricocheted back in her direction. As she picked it up, I said...Oooo Ray it's hot! You can't hold it! It's too hot!...all in an effort to get her to play along. She held it, looked at me and said, "No Mom, it cool off."

Bird's Eye View of Parenting

I'm happy to report that our robin family survived the storms last night & this morning. After the last group of babies died, I'm seriously rooting for them. I know, I'm weird! All this bird watching has made me see a number of parallels between the robins and us.

1. The best chance for survival is linked to the strength of the home. The robin's first nest wasn't built nearly as well as her second. Because her nest is stronger this time, she and her babies were able to survive the turbulent storms.
2. Parents are called to fiercely protect their children. Robins aren't as fierce as other birds, but I guarantee if they thought I meant them harm, they would protect those little ones from me no matter what. Throughout the storms, the female stayed on the nest....even when the tree was swaying so much that she probably had to hang on with her wings!
3. Caring for offspring isn't just the responsibility of the mother. I'm fascinated at how the male & female robin help each other. I don't know for sure who sits on the nest...whether just the female, just the male or both...but there are always two around. Every time I see the male (assuming he's not on the nest), he has a worm in his mouth, and he visits the nest often. So from a distance, it appears as though he is caring for the female, so that she can in turn care for the babies.
4. Parents are called to teach their children how to survive. When their old enough, the female and/or male will teach the babies how to fly, find food, etc. I kinda doubt that robins worry about whether their offspring are happy, self-confident or popular. And there certain things the babies will learn only on their own. The male & female will demonstrate for the babies a number of skills, but it's up to the baby to learn the actual skill itself. We as parents are called not only to teach with our words but with our actions as well.
5. Sometimes, despite our best intents, life doesn't turn out like we plan...and neither do our children. I was bummed when the first robin babies died. The female and male worked hard to ensure their survival, and so did I. But they just weren't strong enough to make it. Despite our best intentions, hard word and lectures, my husband & I know our children may end up following the path we'd like them to. Besides the normal parenting tasks, all we can do is pray for them like crazy. And when something bad does happen, pray some more.

I'd like to think that my husband & I have done a pretty good job...so far. Our most challenging years are yet to come, but if we "stay the course", I think the girls will be all right. They will probably make...strike that, they WILL make....mistakes and bad decisions. But hopefully with us in their corner, they'll be able to survive the every day storms that hit them.

Sugar Baby

I made the brilliant decision to give Ray her first ice cream cone tonight about 30 minutes before bed. We're in the middle of a fierce thunderstorm tonight, so she was a little scared and didn't want to stay in bed. I let her sit with me on the couch until the worst of it passed, and boy was that little girl hyper!! I watched one of those "truth or myth" episodes of 20/20 awhile ago. One of the things discussed...sugar makes children hyper - truth or myth? The so-called experts said that it doesn't, but all I need is to see the effect it has on my child to know that it does. Expert-schmepfert.

I'm a little worried about some other babies tonight. We have a robin in the tree in our front yard - planted the year that Ray was born. She laid eggs about a month ago, and they hatched. But that's when all the storms hit Iowa, and they didn't make it. At one point, I tried to help her out by moving the nest lower and by returning the babies to the nest every time they fell out. The momma didn't seem to mind; she kept coming back to care for them. I was disappointed when they died but was encouraged when I saw her rebuilding her nest a few days later. This morning, I noticed that her new eggs just hatched....I could see just a hint of fuzzy feathers underneath her. And of course, it storms again tonight!!! The wind hasn't been too bad, but we had several gusts that whipped the tree around. So hopefully all is well with the robin family. I'd like to see at least one little birdie make it out of her nest this year.

Oh the things she does

Ray is a non-stop source of funny. At 2 1/2, she does and says things that have us in stitches at least once a week. Last week, I was talking to my husband when she asked for juice. I didn't want her to fill up on juice before supper, so I told her no and resumed the conversation with my husband. She climbed onto my lap, took my face gently in both hands, and said, "Look at me...juice." Before rejecting her second request, I had to laugh. If I think Ray is ignoring me, I'll take her face in my hands and tell her to "look at me". So she was just imitating what she knows - gotta give her props for that!

The other night, she was getting down from the dinner table and bumped her head. I was feeding Jordi and couldn't get up, so I told her to come to me for a kiss on her bump. Instead she decided to kiss her hand and then pat the bump...essentially kissing the owie on her own. What a goof...she gets that from her dad. :)

Reminders

Are your children always well-behaved? Are you the perfect parent? I'd venture to say that your answer to both questions is "no", and if you answered "yes" to either one, I challenge your reality. :) Because the truth is that kids are not always well-behaved, and we as flawed human beings are not perfect. And for anyone who is not yet a parent, let me assure you: we are all in (or will be in) the same boat!

My kids are pretty great. I realize that, and I enjoy being with them...most of the time. There are those times when they're not so terrific, and I need a break. I don't apologize for that. But what I need to remember is that even in the hard times, my kids are still terrific. My sister-in-law came over for dinner a couple weeks ago, and as she left she said, "Your kids make me want to have kids." I told her to come over before naptime some day. She stopped me by saying, "I don't say that very often." (In other words, don't dismiss what I just said.) Why was I so quick to dismiss her compliment? (By the way, thanks for the compliment, Richelle!) I was reminded that even though my kids are not always (nor will they ever be) perfect, they are still the most lovable creatures in my life. As children, their job is to learn by testing their boundaries. As a parent, my job is to show them where the boundaries are. And when the boundary is crossed, which it will surely be every day, it is my job to lovingly correct them.

As a parent, I think I do a pretty good job. My kids are healthy, happy and smart. I'd love to take all the credit for that, but I can't because my husband has a lot to do with that as well as the other adults in their lives. My Heavenly Father also has a lot to do with that to because despite my best intentions, I have made some big mistakes in my short journey as a parent...and He's always there to help me. One mistake happened just the other day at the playground. I tried to help Ray up a tall ladder while holding Jordi...BIG mistake! Thankfully Ray made it up to the platform without incident, but immediately after she did, Jordi decided to do one of her famous back arches. She bent back until she was a little more than parallel to the ground. OUCH! I quickly stablized her, but not before scaring the life out of her and me. What in the world was I thinking?! In my efforts to help both girls, I was absolutely no help to either one.

I'd like to think my kids are more behaved than most and that I'm a better parent than most. But the truth is that when I am full of pride regarding myself or my children, God has a way of reminding me that He is the only perfect parent, and Jesus was the only perfect child. Perfection is a trap - all we can do is all we can do. When your kids do right, praise them! When they don't, show them love as you redirect them. When you as a parent do right, give yourself a gold star for the day. But when you don't, learn from the mistake, don't beat yourself up and move on to the next day...and the next mistake! :)

Where Did the Time Go?

I cannot believe it's been over a year since I've posted anything to my blog! Our life has been quite hectic in that time, so my absence has not been because of boredom!! Since my last entry, the number of kids increased, and the amount of free time decreased. But I'm going to give this another shot...not because I want to join the masses and create yet another insignificant blog. Admittedly, my writing skills are less than perfect, but I enjoy the process. It also stimulates my brain beyond the non-stop "mommy" requests...AND it helps jog my memory for little things that might otherwise get forgotten admist those non-stop "mommy" requests.

Just in case, I will begin by introducing myself again to the anonymous masses. About 18 months ago, I left Corporate America behind me. At that time, I remembered a conversation with a college classmate. We discussed where we would be in 10 years. I proudly exclaimed that I would be a CEO of some high-tech company. He smiled one of those smiles and said, "You would make a better mommy than a CEO." He quickly added that he didn't think I could backstab and scratch my way to the top. I couldn't argue. At twenty-one, I sure as heck wasn't going to be a SAHM. Of course, I was in a failing marriage and had just graduated from college. Funny how fourteen years in the "real world" and the love of a great man changes you.

My "mommy experiment" didn't start the day I quit full-time work. It started at approximately 8pm on February 1, 2006...when my daughter, Ray, took her first breath. I was a working mom for nearly a year, and it was not what I wanted for my life. My hubby and I worked very hard and sacrificed a lot in that year in order to move to Phase Two of the mommy experiment, which involved me becoming a SAHM. I was a technical geek in Corporate America for about 14 years, so the transition from that to SAHM was difficult. I continue to struggle even today! I'm not perfect, but I try to do my best for my daughters every day. Will I ever get it right? Who knows...stay tuned!